10 MORE Times Mean Girls Quotes Directly Applied to Parenting
by Jessica Franklin
I am pretty new to this exclusive club that is motherhood, but like Cady with the Plastics, I assimilated pretty quickly. And now? I am privy to smug understanding of mommy jokes on blogs like this one. I’m at the lunchroom table, girls. And I’m here to share some Mean Girls inspired parenting truths.
Here are ten more Mean Girls’ quotes that apply directly to parenting. You’re welcome.
“She doesn’t even GO here!” When non-parents try to give parenting advice.
“Why are you so obsessed with me?!” When your toddler won’t even let you pee alone.
“Your face smells like peppermint!” Because I left my toothpaste within reach and you smeared it all over yourself.
“And none for Gretchen Wieners, bye!” When the grandparents come visit with a whole carload of presents for the kiddos and forget that you, their actual child, are there too.
“That’s only ok when I say it!” So please stop saying swear words at school…and at grandma’s house…and at the store….
“Stop trying to make fetch happen! It’s not going to happen!” When your child asks you for the seventeenth time if they can pleeeeeease have a puppy.
“I WANT MY PINK SHIRT BACK!!!” But I can’t wear it because my milk-filled boobs popped the buttons when I tried to squeeze into it 3 months postpartum
“Is your muffin buttered? Would you like someone to butter your muffin?” And you’ll say yes. But then when I put butter on it you will start crying because you DIDNT want your muffin buttered.
“Oh hi, did you want to buy some drugs?” Because I’ve got half the pharmacy in the diaper bag. Tylenol, gas drops, gripe water, saline, Orajel, leftover Amoxicillin (you know, for a surprise ear infection?), I also have a thermometer and a bulb syringe. I’m fairly sure Macgyver could do something amazing with all of this….
“I just have a lot of feelings….” Because I’m so happy and in love with this little person it hurts, but it’s so overwhelming sometimes that I break down and cry or scream into a pillow. I want some time to myself, but when I get some I just feel guilty and miss my baby. It’s PMS on steroids.
(Did you enjoy this post? You should check out it’s best friend. She’s fetch.)
About the Author:
Jessica is a 20-something wife, mother, and teacher with strong opinions and a (self-proclaimed) big mouth! If you thought this post was pretty “grool,” check out her blog, Ms. Mommy for more of my experiences as a mommy, a wife, and a teacher!